One of the best advice I received from a co teacher is this: “Be kind and understanding to your special someone always or as much as you can.”
Now, I am far from perfect and there are times I lose my patience and calmness.
However, I tried my best to put that advice in my heart and mind and practice it.
I only have one caution to my dear: “Let me eat when I am hungry cause I can be grumpy if not.” LOL.
To further talk about our love bank, it is important that we know there are 5 love languages according to Dr. Gary Chapman.
My dear and I downloaded a free pdf of it online and read it when we were still starting as a new LDR couple and it is one of the best pre-wedding books I will recommend to those who are willing to learn more about each other needs.
My dear and I even answered an online quiz to know what is our primary love language and its hierarchy to us.
Below is our results.
The first screenshot is my dear’s result and the second is mine. Both of our primary language is physical touch but we have different scores. I even observed and joked that my result looks like a perfect countdown.
After knowing our partner’s primary love language, it is up to us to always remember it and take it seriously. The consequence of what we do in relation to our partner’s love language is vital to the relationship. It will decide if we will have a healthy or unhealthy relationship. As much as it is a love bank, it is also the lifeline of the relationship.
When we deposit the right amount and kind of love our partner needs to their love bank, the interest is higher. Good interest that we don’t even need to withdraw cause they will give it to us freely and consistently. As long as we religiously deposit on their love bank, we will enjoy the regular interest.
Now, there are times when we commit some mistakes which is equivalent to withdrawal in the love bank. The bigger the mistake, the bigger the withdrawal. If we did not save enough, we will feel and see their love bank empty. Even negative and in the brink of bankruptcy.
To avoid this, let us follow these words from Bo Sanchez: “Plain, simple, regular kindness will solve a lot of marital problems.”
How to be kind? Deposit the right amount and kind of love regularly however plain and simple they are.
How to be understanding? Understand the love language of our partner.